Blue Heaven, Angel Dust
by Edesina
Summary: Yumi/Sachiko, Yumi/OMC. Death, drugs, tragedy. What will you do when the one you love commits suicide? To make things worse, after her death you learn that all you knew about her was a lie. How can you keep on living? Two-shot.
1. Blue Heaven, Fallen Angel

**Author:** Edesina  
_Beta: choki-choki  
_**Rating:** T

**Pairing:** Yumi/Sachiko  
**Genre:** Angst, Tragedy, Songfic  
**Disclaimer:** I don't own Marimite and the lyrics (in _italics_) are from the song Time by I'dees.  
**Summary**: _Police officers had found a hidden bottle of small pills. The analysis had revealed the horrifying truth: LSD, also known as Blue Heaven._

**Warnings:** Character death, drugs, suicidal behavior  
**A/N**: First, thank you for helping me with this, choki-choki.

I know, I know… Idea is old as sky… But this song requires angst and tragedy. If you haven't heard it, I recommend that you open Youtube and search this song. It is pretty beautiful and unknown.

That drugs part…. I dunno. Hopefully I didn't mess with the facts. And about the title, Blue heaven is commonly known as LSD and Angel dust as cocaine. In the text is also mentioned "Cloud" – hashish. I don't know why but there aren't many fics about drugs here o_O

* * *

**Blue Heaven, Angel Dust**

* * *

_Here we are  
And our lifes like butterflies  
Will fly away from us towards the sky  
_

Cold sunrays dance eerily on the tall, green grass. The time has stopped here, not even quiet steps can be heard. A lone butterfly flies past me, has it lost its soul mate? I can feel the wind but when I look at the blossoming cherry trees the pink flowers are completely still, _frozen_.

It's so cold and dead. This is why I hate graveyards – I keep on shivering. Tombstones after tombstones, the ground has an eternal tear-veil. This is a place where lies painful memories, ground is stained with tear-droplets. Un-welcome and painful memories crawl into my mind without asking permission.

_**She is hugging me, tears of happiness running down on her cheeks. She graduated with excellent grades and got in the Lillian University. She didn't know how much I hated it. She'll go away and I am all alone. Just a couple of years and she would become vet – a dream of hers. Shall I be the forgotten one? Disregarding my thoughts, I smiled and congratulated her. My fears were not going to ruin her special day. **_

_The time of laughter the time of tears  
The time of dreams and many fears  
Will be erased for memory  
_

I see the familiar stone, the one that haunted me. Her grave. The stone is pure white marble, as pale as her skin was. Her sudden death was a shock to everyone. How could a perfectly happy person like her commit a suicide? No one had the answer; it had vanished into thin air when she took her last breath. We could only keep guessing.

Of course I wondered why? What could have been so bad that she needed to escape from it? We were happy together, weren't we? Was it because of me? What did I do wrong?

_** "Onee-sama?" I whispered. We were in a dark closet embracing each other. The closeness was like electricity, it turned my blood into fiery hot lava.  
_"_Shh… Not now, Yumi," she almost purred to my ear. Her lips nibbled my ear, jaw line, neck. The gentle touches were slowly driving me crazy. I wanted her now and a few kisses weren't enough to satisfy my needs. **_

A small piece of paper shed light to the mystery. Since it wasn't essential part of crime investigation anymore, two days ago I had received my onee-sama's last words. She had written a short letter which only caused more pain and confusion. Wasn't I good enough for her? Didn't I deserve more than a handful of words? Then why did she write?

"_Sorry, Yumi. I guess I couldn't reach the Heaven even with the guidance of Angels. I hope you can forgive me one day.  
- Sachiko"_

Police officers had found hidden bottles of small pills and powders along with that note. The analysis had revealed the terrifying truth: LSD, also known as Blue Heaven and a small amount of Snow, heroin. People said that addicts wanted to escape reality.

What had been so special about the drugs? Why had she chosen false reality instead of me? I blamed myself for not being good enough for her and in the same time I was desperately searching the answer. I was angry, really mad at her for leaving me in the dark. She had never said a thing yet I failed to notice her inner pain, depression and fragility.

My first meeting with cloud was weird to say the least. I was fully aware that I was doing the same as my onee-sama. I was desperate to find out the truth. If it meant that I had to smoke a bit different tobacco from the usual so be it.

_See how far  
We're going trying to hold on  
To what we gotta look for reasons why_

It was a sweet brush with illegal activities, intoxicating. For the first time in a couple of months living felt good. The excitement of breaking the law was amazing and Cloud opened my eyes for the first time in my life. I no longer suffered, her death was just a horror of my imagination. Everything felt so real. I noticed voices I didn't know existed, the smell of our bedroom, the taste of water. And I knew she was coming back home, I just had to wait.

_Imagine life is just a dream  
Imagine you imagine me  
Travelling on the wings of time  
Don't know where or why_

Cloud gazing soon wasn't enough to numb my pain, the world slowly lost its colours one by one. The month after my fist time is just a blur. Shattered nightmare, full of disconnected faces, conversations and persons. All I can remember was that I tried everything I could to avoid feeling anything when I couldn't smoke. It wasn't rare that I woke up next to an unknown person and had a hellish hangover. Those mornings reminded me of our last meeting, as different as that beginning of the day had been.

_**She looked sick, her skin was paler than usual, almost lucid. What had former been rose pink lips were now just a shadow. Only her eyes had preserved the sparkle._

"_You should eat, onee-sama," I scolded her, she hadn't touched her breakfast. She really made me worry, she had withered in a flash. "Are you okay?"  
_"_Yeah, I'm just not hungry," she replied and sipped her coffee. Her hands were trembling, not because the lack of caffeine though. That was her fifth mug this morning. How could she drink that much coffee anyway? And strong coffee, it was more like tar!_

"_Tell me, Yumi," she hesitated for a moment. "Do you believe in God?"  
_"_No," I finally replied tilting my head to the left. She didn't mimic the move, not anymore. "Do you?"  
_"_I believe in Heaven." **_

I wonder if she reached the heaven she believed in. Cloud was replaced with cocaine because I liked the nickname – Angel Dust. Onee-sama had been my angel so it felt right to let an angel soothe my pain. And the world regained the colours again.

_I never noticed my reflection; a ghostlike and malnourished girl who never learnt to leave past behind. I had no strength to care._

_'Couse we can't turn back time  
__We can't turn back time_

* * *

Fin

**A/N2:** Snow is also cocaine's nickname but since Yumi uses that drug (and the nick Angel Dust) I thought that Sachiko might use a bit stronger stuff. Also I might write a sequel to this if it's wanted ;)


	2. Sequel – The Dance of Life and Death

**A/N:** Again a sad story. Don't like tragedies, don't read. Still, this is quite short. (this is twice as long as the actual story) Same warnings, new characters and 3rd person PoV. This time I didn't let anyone to beta this so all the mistakes are completely mine. Here's drugs but I found also a new interest.

Yue is my OMC. Otherwise same disclaimer.

This time music is **Pendulum – Witchcraft**

* * *

_Sequel – The Dance of Life and Death_

* * *

_Few months later…_

_It's in your eyes, a colour fade out  
__Looks like a new transition_

Yoshino had never seen anyone in such a condition before. Yumi was pale and she had lost a lot of weight. Her eyes seemed to have sunken in the skull and how her cheekbones were emphasized! It seemed like there was nothing in the between bone and skin. Her eyes were dark and they gleamed in a weird way.

"Yumi?" the dark haired young woman asked. No reply. She tried again. "Yumi?"

"She can't hear you, Yoshino," Sei replied without looking at the brunette who was bare ghost of her former happy self. After Sachiko's funeral she had disappeared for a whole year before calling her. Sei had informed both Rei and Yoshino, who had been worried about the brunette. Especially Yoshino who had made tons of 'what if' scenarios.

"What do you mean?" Yoshino asked cautiously.

"Those." Sei nodded towards a set of small syringes. Yoshino heard Rei's sharp inhale as she leaned closer and almost touched one. Sei's tight grip prevented her from doing so.

"Don't touch them," Sei and Rei warned at the same time. Their voices were still quite low, as if they were afraid to wake Yumi up from her deep trance.

"What are they?"

"Hypos," Rei whispered. The sound was eerie in the dark, small room and her face was paler than usual.

"I'll call the ambulance," Yoshino tried to get out but Sei stopped her.

"Whatever you do, that's not something we should so. She's got right to make her own decisions."

"But she might die!"

"She knows it," Sei snapped. She looked at Rei and asked help. Yelling wouldn't help anything and she didn't have ability to explain the situation to the younger girl.

"Sei means that Yumi has to get over _her_ on her own. If drugs are her way, we shouldn't interfere, right?" Sei nodded feeling a slight relief when Yoshino nodded too. The dark haired girl was right. They should call ambulance. That could save Yumi's life… or future. Yet she couldn't do it. She had a moral rule and that was to let others do as they wished.

* * *

_** The Dance of Life and Death**_

* * *

Sei hated bars. She hated half-drunken people who wanted to get in her bed and who didn't listen when she said no. If she could have decided they would meet in a good but cheap fish-restaurant just a couple of alleys away. They would drank brisk white wine with their starter salads and more well-bodied French chardonnay with their main courses, not aqueous beer or stale cognac in her case.

"Hey," a weak voice said emotionlessly.

"It's time you showed up, Yumi," Sei replied bitterly and hushed a drunken man who was at least twice her age, away.

"You seem to attract people as ever," brunette noted ignoring her companion's words. Sei was less than interested in futile chitchat so she cut to the chase. Yumi wasn't really nice companion nowadays. She was gloomy and quiet as a rock unless she drank like endless well. The blonde hadn't been shocked when she had seen this new side of Yumi for the first time. To be honest she had quite expected it. Sachiko had been Yumi's world, it had been love that's close to suicidal.

Sei gave a small bag and a piece of paper with a number written on in to Yumi. "Here's enough to end your pain if you want to and this is the number of a date service. I think it's about time you to decide whether you want to keep going or not."

With that said she splashed the rest of her cognac on a man who came dangerously closer and left the bar.

She hated bars. She hated drunken people because they were annoying. She hated men because they didn't listen. And above all she hated herself for doing what she had just done. She had fucked someone's life.

* * *

_** The Dance of Life and Death**_

* * *

_A year later…_

Yumi rushed quickly towards the bathroom as her insides were turning around. She were in the corridor, just meters away from the correct door when she vomited.

"Dear?" a male voice called from the upstairs. "Are you okay?" When he got no response, he hurried downstairs to his future-wife. Yumi was trembling and she breathed heavily. Cold sweat covered her skin and her insides were burning painfully. She couldn't move at all and the man had to carry her back to the bedroom.

"It's just… it's just nausea. I'll be better soon," Yumi whispered and wished that man would leave. She wanted to be alone with her thoughts and doubts. When was last time she had period? She wasn't quite sure… And she was feeling a little better as the sun rose and she had managed to drink small amount of juice.

_Bleeding on a sofa  
__Staring at the waistline  
__He's coming and she knows it_

Her mood lighted up as she went on. What would Yue say when he found out? Yumi's heart felt a lot of lighter and she was happy that she had made this choice. Or more like fate had decided for her. And she would talk to Yue today. Maybe she could also forgive Sei and give her a call for the first time after a year of silence.

_**Flashback**_

"_I think it's about time you to decide whether you want to keep going or not." Sei's eyes were cold but Yumi didn't care. She had never asked that the blonde would do anything for her. She needn't help. And what could Sei possibly do? Sei didn't know what meant to lose someone you loved more than yourself. _

_Before Yumi could say anything the blonde had left which suited her just fine. Sei was cold bastard. Decide what to do? Keep going or not, life wasn't that black and white. _

"_Screw you, fucking idiot," Yumi muttered as she elbowed her way out of the bar. She was too annoyed to drink, she needed a fix instead. And Sei had just given her more than enough if she could believe the blonde's words._

_Yumi slid into a dark and smelly alley. It was perfect, empty and full of shadows where she could hide if she had to. She fished the bag out of her pocket and opened it. It was snowy-white powder, enough for two or three times. Sei hadn't been kidding about the amount. _

"_Wow, look at this! The slut has snow," a shabby man grabbed her wrist and took the bag. Two other men wobbled closer and the first man let Yumi go. He got what he wanted._

_Yumi stared as the man opened the bag and turned his back at her. She didn't have to see it to know what he did and next thing she saw was him falling down. He didn't utter a word as his body hit the ground._

_His friends ran away as did the brunette. He stayed still… Yumi was sure that he was dead. _

'_This was what Sei had meant? I never talk to her again.'_

___**End of Flashback**_  


She vomited every morning for a week but now her condition didn't improve during day. She wasn't hungry and when she ate, it was just grape or two. She felt stubborn pain behind her lungs that didn't let her sleep in nights. She lay nest to the sleeping Yue and sobbed quietly.

_Darkness in the bedroom  
__Maybe she is resting up_

On the Friday afternoon Yue hurried to home. He was worried about Yumi who had been horribly sick. Yet that sickness wasn't contagious. He wasn't stupid so he knew what Yumi suspected. They shared the same doubt. He stopped at the store on his way back home and bought a bottle of orange lemonade hoping that it'd help.

He hurried to their apartment stepping only on every third stair. Fourth floor where their home was, came quickly.

"I'm home!" he didn't stop even to take his jacket off and rushed to the living room. He froze completely. Yumi was lying on the sofa. She looked horribly fragile because she had lost a lot of weight during the week. Her face was completely pale and Yue couldn't even hear her breathing. He knew that this wasn't what was supposed to happen. Her hand slid into pocket searching for a cell phone.

_I can't hear her breathing  
__Something doesn't seem right_

"Yue… I think I need to see a doctor…" Yumi whispered without having strength to open her eyes. It was like she had read Yue's thoughts. As the words escaped her lips, she felt again a wave of nausea and turned a bit. She had a bucket next to the sofa but her stomach was empty so all she could do was retch. She hadn't been able to keep even water inside.

"Let's go to the hospital," Yue said without hesitation. He would drive her there. If Yumi was awake he didn't need to call an ambulance. Yue sighed in relief, thank God Yumi's condition wasn't that bad.

* * *

_** The Dance of Life and Death**_

* * *

The doctor had been very understanding but careful with his words. Yes, she might be pregnant, all her symptoms were speaking for that but they had to take some tests. Yumi's morning sickness was quite serious problem and it could mean that something was wrong, for example with her blood levels.

He gave pills that helped because she had to wait week before she got the results. If she couldn't eat anything she might need to stay in hospital. Yue stayed with her whole time and made sure she ate. At least he tried. Yumi's appetite had never been good, there had been days when she ate nothing but now she didn't eat anything if Yue didn't pray, beg and force her to.

Seven days were hell for both of them. When Yumi wasn't asleep, she and Yue fought. They made up after an hour but those quarrels stressed them. Days felt years but finally the Friday came. Neither of them had strength to argue so Yumi skipped breakfast. Yue drank half litre of black coffee and ate eggs and bacon hoping that the smell would make Yumi hungry. His plan was as far from successful as possible because Yumi spent the most of her morning in bathroom vomiting her insides out.

They couldn't stay in the house so they left early and Yue walked hospital's waiting room back and forth. Yumi was sitting on a comfy couch and large green flower shadowed her figure. She had given in his pleas and sipped apple juice. When Yue looked away she poured the contents of the bottle to the plant.

After an eternity a doctor called them in. He went straight to the point. The doctor, who was this time an old man in white jacket, rambled on but Yumi couldn't comprehend a word. Her worst nightmares had become real the moment she had heard the first words.  
_ What had been still curable hepatitis had developed into lethal hepatic cancer._

_Footsteps in the hallway  
__Girl you haven't got time_

"_I am terribly sorry to tell you this, Miss Fukuzawa, but you have less than six months left."_

* * *

Fin

**A/N2:** Hope you… err… I hope you think it was well-written. I can't say I hope you enjoyed it because I tried to make a sad story. Comments would be awesome because this kind of fics aren't as common as romance stories so I'd like to know if anyone read this.


End file.
